Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
