He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize