Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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