I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Randomize
