hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
We were destined to go to rehab together
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize
