The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
This is my gift to your gina
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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