The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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