Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I think a kid would responsible me up
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Randomize
