if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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