her vagine was all disorganized.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize