I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
