opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
