So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize