GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
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