So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
