it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
cat food counts as protein by the way
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize
