marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
