youre lurking in front of me
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Randomize