Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
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