Already got asked if we're dating
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize