in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
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