i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
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