I'm jealous of your bromance
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
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