he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
