is your mom at the bar?
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize