So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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