Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Your penis caused this!
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize