Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
