We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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