Christians are straight up FREAKS
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Drunk walkin through police station. America
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
He better not be in your backpack
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
