why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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