The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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