didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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