He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
cat food counts as protein by the way
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
