I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
