erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
