my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize
