I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Randomize
