garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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