I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
