3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize