we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
