On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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