what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
