you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize