Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
No more Irish car bombs ever.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Never joke about your clitoris.
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