Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
