I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
