She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
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