He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Randomize
