hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
