Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
